There’s a boys club at the office? Go in! Don’t wait to be invited, just go in! 13 Lessons We Learned from the #LHNPDC19 6th Conference

Women’s Social Development Network, the LightHouseWomen’s network held its 6th personal development conference on Saturday, 8th June, 2019 with an all inclusive and diverse theme: Views From The Other Side, the keynote speaker, Mrs Oluwatomi Somefun (MD of Unity Bank) as well as distinguished Panelists, comprising: Obinnia Abajue, Managing Director of Hygeia HMO, Amaechi Okobi, Group Head Marketing and Communications for Access Bank, Debola Williams, Managing Director of Red media and Tafar Osisiye Author of ‘sixty percent of a true story’ had a lot to dish out.

Nkiru Olumide-Ojo programme initiator, network founder and one of the organizers of the event believes “It is important that we have two sided honest conversations, which was the reason for this event, We believe at the lighthouse women’s network that men are critical to the conversation of female’s development, a two sided conversation will have a more robust outcome; the speakers have been carefully selected based on their experiences from either leading a gender diverse business, team or being part of one”

Leading Ladies Africa, was present at the event and we had a lot of valuable questions answered, points to take home and lessons on how women can thrive in career.

Points from the Key note Speaker – Mrs Tomi Somefun

  • Your careee is not an end::

It is important to note that your career is only a means to an end, it is not the end. Anything contrary to this will most likely end you when things get tough. It is a journey that you mustn’t let define you.

  • Your goals should align with your purpose:

Most times, it is not always easy to get your goals to align with your purpose but it is very important while chasing your career. It is important you find your happy place and what works for you.

  • Relationships are key:

On this journey, it is essential to manage your relationships well. Being a boss today doesn’t mean you have to be aggressive. Your staff can be in a position to help you tomorrow. There is nothing to prove when people fear you, demanding respect has nothing to do with being unreasonable or unapproachable. Be kind. Female bosses have to change the narrative, ask your staff, How Are You Today?, and mean it.

  • Follow your own lane and avoid comparisons

Everybody’s path /road to getting to their destination is different. So? Follow your own lane, avoid comparisons. Copying another person’s path may not necessarily work for you.

  • Mentorship

As a woman, it is not compulsory to have a female mentor and to have only one mentor, you can decide to have different mentors for different purposes.

  • What do you do with your failure?

Failing is not the problem, because if you’ve not failed, you’ve got started. It is what you do with your failure that counts. When you fail it is important to try something else or try the same thing in a different way.


  • If there’s a boys club at the office, don’t wait to be invited, go in! Be more bullish, not aggressive, demand respect and don’t expect to be given preferential treatment.
  • Don’t cry in front of the boys at work or in public, because when tough decisions come and this will always come, (which can be an opportunity to boost your position) the boys won’t come to you for fear of drama. You want cry? Its fine, go to the toilet and clean it up!
  • Master the art of living and know when anger is useless. If your anger won’t add any value, drop it!
  • Take advantage of your strength and own your value, most men aren’t good planners or multi-taskers but you’ll never hear it, women are good at this but don’t put themselves out there enough.
  •  When a man needs a raise, he goes ahead and ask. Women just sit and hope you recognize them. This is wrong, demand pay for your worth and don’t be scared.
  • Thriving at work is only 20% Hard work. It is more of relationships, network, owning your value and stepping up to do strategic tasks that add value when not asked to.
  • Women have to learn the art of strategic/peaceful confrontations. Always clarify, discuss and  speak in the workplace.

For more of this, follow the @thelighthousewomensnetwork on socials and look out for their events!

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